Fueled by the fire of watching an entire episode of “New Girl” dedicated to dating apps, we’re going on a social media rant. Specifically, we’re talking Tinder (aka Dice?), Cuddlr and Ello.
With the rise of apps like Grindr and Tinder, casual sex has soared to new heights of impersonal, sexy fun. We praise the pursuit of a good O for any and all humans. But this doesn’t come without some concessions being made:
1. Humans are social creates who crave connections. Yes, some people want/need them more than others. But the point is this, a good romp will only give you satisfaction for so long.
2. These things can be a breeding ground for disrespect. I’m using you for sex, you’re using me, we owe each other nothing. Basic common courteously is out the window.
image: giphy.com
Let’s be honest. These apps all operate without a social conscience.
According to sex coach Reid Mihalko, we live in a highly “touch-deprived society.” Cuddlr asks that you respect your cuddle without asking for anything more so people can be soothed by a little platonic human contact. Connection finding… check. Respect… check.
Except ultimately this cuddle is soothing a craving very temporarily.
Whether it’s sex or cuddles, it’s all quite devoid of real concern for human beings. Where’s that social conscience?
The rise of these semi-social media channels does bring an interesting question to mind. Their mass popularity suggests they hit the spot with a societal craving in today’s instant gratification driven world. Is their arrival signalling a sort of recklessness in the collective Western psyche? Are we losing our ability to have a social conscience in our intimate (or platonic) encounters with people?
If you’re one of the many who see an issue with the lack of conscience present in our social/digital interactions, you’re not alone. That’s evident in the creation of sites like Ello, the invitation only outlet some think could eclipse Facebook. Facebook and Ello seem very different. In a way, Ello is grownup Tumblr. Their mandate is one of transparency, free information sharing without the risk of it being sold. They note:
“We believe a social network can be a tool for empowerment. Not a tool to deceive, coerce and manipulate – but a place to connect, create and celebrate life.”
Now, don’t get us wrong. We’re not saying apps like Tinder or Cuddlr are inherently deceptive or bad. At their core they’re actually very honest. Brutally honest. And a tonne of fun. But they don’t foster the sense of community, partnership or conscience that Ello is going for. It’s unlikely many can form a lasting bond or have any kind of impactful impression result from these experiences.
We’re putting it to you. Is there room in the social media landscape for such different vantage points? Is there room for more or have we had our fill?
